Thursday, 19 July 2012

Original Cocktail Inventions, part 2: The Witch's Tit

Sexy witch

While I was conducting the experiments that led to the creation of the Yorkshire Guilt, Brenda returned home one day with a tin of gooseberries (in syrup). Immediately forming in my mind was a plan to use them for another cocktail creation. This time though, there was no overriding theme, no direction… I was going to have to start from nothing.

I began by blending the contents of the can, and storing it in the fridge, as I had with the tinned rhubarb. Beyond that, I had nothing. I just knew that I wanted to make something a bit different. I started thinking about multi-layered drinks where the different densities of the different liquids cause them to either sink to the bottom or sit on the top – like in a Tequila Sunrise.

I also thought I should use some ingredients that I have enough of to experiment with – I didn’t want to get close to a eureka moment, only to find that I would have to suspend trials because I’d run out of something.

The Witch's Tit with it's proud parents
A quick glance to the front left corner of my kitchen cupboard provided an answer. There was half a bottle of Tesco Imperial vodka (not considered essential, since I still had most of a bottle of Russian Standard) and a small bottle of Chambord liqueur that I hadn’t found much of a use for.

I put 5 ice cubes in a cocktail shaker, poured over 1 measure of vodka and 100ml of the gooseberry puree. I then shook until a frost formed and strained into a small wine glass. The seeds in the gooseberry puree were blocking the strainer, so I had to stir a little with my finger to make sure enough of the mixture came through. Finally I carefully poured a measure of Chambord into the middle, and it quickly sank to the bottom, leaving me with a green drink that tapered into a red and yellow mixture at the bottom (yellow from the gooseberry seeds).

I tasted it, and it was delicious. That’s it, no more experiments necessary. All that was needed was a name, and that came quickly – The Witch’s Tit – because the glass gave it the shape of a breast (if you use your imagination, see above). The main part of the breast is green (like a witch’s skin, see right), then there was the red of the Chambord like a nipple, and the seeds of the gooseberries like the yellow Montgomery tubercles of a lady’s nipple. Done and dusted.

It does look like a witch's tit, doesn't it?
A witch's skin is known to be green
That recipe in more digestible form:

5-6 ice cubes
1 measure vodka
100ml gooseberry puree (made from the entire contents of a tin of gooseberries)
1 measure Chambord

Shake the vodka and gooseberry puree with the ice until a frost forms. Strain into a small wine glass, stirring inside the strainer with your finger to ensure enough liquid and seeds come through. Quickly but carefully pour the Chambord into the middle of the glass, and let it sink to the bottom. Serve. 

 A bonus photo
Bwah! I said witches are known to be green, not make you turn green!


  1. It turns out there is already a cocktail called the Witch's Tit. That's a shame. I'd post a link for you, but it doesn't actually seem like anyone can agree on what it's called. I'll be doing a bit more research when I get chance, and if it appears to be quite an established drink, I'll think of a new name for mine. If not, it can just be another cocktail called the Witch's Tit.

  2. Sorry, I meant "no one can agree on the recipe".